


Redefining Bravery

by SparrowFlight246



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blind Character, Blind!Lafayette, College AU, Diabetes, Diabetic!Alex, Epilepsy, Epileptic!John, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Paralysis, Paraplegic!Hercules, Seizures, Support Groups, disabilities au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-25
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-02-06 16:20:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12821325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SparrowFlight246/pseuds/SparrowFlight246
Summary: Alexander Hamilton is diabetic.John Laurens in an epileptic.Hercules Mulligan is a paraplegic.Lafayette is blind.They meet on the campus of Princeton at a chronic illness and disabilities support group, a bunch of overeager freshmen smashed together by chance. Their entire college career,  their entirelivesare right there in front of them.And, with the help of each other and a certain professor by the name of George Washington, they might just get through it in one piece.It’s not probable but you can’t rule out the chances.





	1. The Support Group is Unsupportive

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Yep, you’re looking at a new story! Ta da! 
> 
> Don’t let the premise fool you, this is actually gonna be a really fun fic. It will likely update weekly once it’s on it’s feet, but this first chapter is also my suave way of seeing how many people are interested in the story and seeing it continued, so let me know if you are! Pretty please leave me a kudos if you’re feeling kind or a comment if you’re feeling incredibly angelic letting me know what you think. Y’all in with this?
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy!

“Yes, I’m going. Yes, I’m _actually_ going. No, I’m not just saying that to get you off my case. No, I don’t understand why you’re making me do this, and I don’t know if I’ll ever fully forgive you for it -and yes, Ned, I am kidding- but I’m going, I really am, I promise.”

A a good minute of muffled response came through the prehistoric smartphone at that, causing Alex Hamilton to huff out a sigh as he switched his bag from one shoulder to another. Walking briskly through the campus and hoping that he at least appeared like he knew where he was going, Alex listened to his friend ramble on with a dry expression as he turned the complicated map gripped in his hands, attempting to make heads or tails of the intricate markings and the truly incomprehensible directions he had received from a vague, rushed looking sophomore a few minutes prior. The day was cold and clear, the air crisp and the sky cloudless even as the freshman struggled to figure out where, exactly, he was supposed to be going. 

As Ned’s lecture drew to a close, Alex let out another irritated growl under his breath, stopping abruptly on the sidewalk he was pacing and still staring at the map with a sense of annoyed frustration. “Yeah, yeah,” he said distractedly, having heard maybe a fourth of Ned’s most recent rant, receiving an indignant squawk from Ned in return but powering on regardless of the other man’s protests. “In other news, I cannot figure out this damn map for the life of me. Where the hell is this place?!” 

Pinning the phone between his shoulder and ear to free up his right hand, he now used both hands to evaluate the markings, scanning the page with irritated precision. He was the one stationary figure in the midst of a sea of new over excited Princeton students, unmoving as the crowd parted around him.

 _”Have you tried asking for directions? No offense, but you do tend to forget the simplest stuff like that at the most terrible times,”_ Ned’s flat voice spoke up, resulting in a halfway offended scoff from Alex. 

“Thanks for your faith in me,” he muttered, tone dry as the map crinkled in his hands.

_”I try.”_

“Wait… if I turn it this way… _aha!_ You better be pretty damn proud of me, Ned, ‘cause I think I just figured out this death trap of hell. Applause is not necessary but highly appreciated.”

_”Congratulations, Alexander. You have figured out how to read a map. I think you’ve nearly hit fourth grade intelligence level; how wonderful for you!”_

“Shut up, Ned.” Finally able to figure out where he was going, Alex began walking again with new purpose in his step as he transferred the phone from his shoulder back to his hand, bottle green sweatshirt sleeve sagging slightly at his wrist with the motion. 

The trees bordering the sidewalk he was following were balanced in the awkward stage between summer green and fall oranges, reds and yellows, when a few green leaves were beginning to be edged with color while the rest of the tree stayed a determined jade, stubbornly not quite ready to change just yet despite the few starting to take on their fall wardrobe. Alex shot a smile up at the leaves as he walked and as he tuned out yet another one of Ned’s mom-lectures that something or another had triggered, the freshman probably looking like a helluva idiot but too blissed out with his current situation to care. Faint smugness at figuring out the guide and giddy excitement at where he was, what the rest of his life was looking like, mixed within him in the weirdest but most interesting way.

Princeton had been his dream, his goal, for years now, for multiple reasons. His mom had died when he was twelve, which ended with his lonely little Caribbean ass getting thrown into the foster system with little to no hesitation. He had landed with Ned and the rest of the Stevens not long into his foster care experience, and although he was later shipped off to America and away from the family, he always stayed in touch with Ned, a hint of home even in the insanity of constantly changing foster homes and keeping grades up and later applying for more colleges and scholarships than Alex knew what to do with. Ned was a constant, steady presence through those last few months that nearly managed to knock Alex off his axis, even when Ned was moving to America himself in the midst of it. 

Of course, that didn’t mean that Ned wasn’t a little shit at times, but for the most part Alex was usually pretty fond of the guy. 

The one other thing that somewhat powered him through his vaguely hellish childhood was none other than Princeton, as odd as he now realized it sounded. Why Princeton and not some other (more affordable and/or convenient) college, he wasn’t really sure, but just the idea of getting his own place with no foster family to deal with, getting out of the foster system entirely, being on his own for the first time in forever, _and_ actually getting a quality education at the same time seemed like heaven on earth to a lonely foster kid with too much time on his hands and too many thoughts in his mind. So Princeton had been his goal since he was thirteen, saving every dollar he acquired, going for every scholarship he could, doing everything possible to get himself where he wanted to be. 

And now, he was _here,_ the exact place he’d been trying and reaching towards for years. Standing on Princeton property, walking through Princeton campus, staying in a Princeton dorm, breathing in Princeton air and watching Princeton birds and lowkey eavesdropping on Princeton students and all in all thinking _oh my god it’s actually happening_ in a whirl of nerves and enthusiasm and excitement. 

Then, suddenly, he got jolted back into the land of the living with blunt sharpness.

Because now he was _here,_ his wondering and giddily enthusiastic musing at the seemingly magical campus cut short by the meeting hall that seemed to plop down in front of him without warning, the looming building surrounded by grass and trees dropping him back into reality and the situation he was attempting not to think about with a resounding _thunk._

_Welcome back, Alex._

Yep, still at Princeton. And yep, life still all right there in front of him. But first, stupid support group that Ned (who was still rambling about something or another through the ancient smartphone still held against Alex’s ear) was forcing him to attend. He literally had barely enough time to drop off his bags at the dorm, found his roommates to not even be in there, and then had to bounce immediately in order to get to this dang group without being late to the first meeting. Needless to say, he wasn’t overly happy about attending, but if it meant Ned would finally back off the nagging, he was willing to try anything. What can he say, he was desperate.

“Alright, I’m here, and the meeting starts in, like, two minutes, so I should probably get going,” he said into the phone, stopped in front of the hall and using his shoulder to pin his phone again. The action freeing his hand, he began a half assed attempt to smooth the flyaways surrounding his ponytail, make himself look halfway acceptable before jumping into the meeting. Sporting an oversized sweatshirt, worn shoes and old jeans, Alex was attempting to go for the artistically homely look. With some luck, people would actually believe that he chose to dress casually versus the true fact that this was all he could really afford. “I’ll text you after to complain about how terrible it was and blame you for making me go, okay?” he added, finally giving up on his hair and taking the phone into his grip again. 

_”Sounds like a plan. But, Alex, at least give it a chance, won’t you? Please?”_ Although Ned’s voice was somewhat crackly and tinny over the line, distant, Alex could still somehow hear the subtle pleading in his tone, the unsaid _please do this or else I’ll worry about you to no extent and we both know that never ends well for either of us_ tacked onto his words. Guess that just happened when you grew up in each other’s faces. Virtually, at least. 

That’s what prompted Alex to give in with a sigh, glancing up at the building before him with a sense of faintly nervous dread yet with a stubborn sense of determination as well. 

“Okay, fine. I promise I’ll at least give it a chance before I blow this popsicle stand. Bye.”

The call ended, leaving Alex standing in front of the meeting hall with a hefty canvas bag slung over one sweatshirt-clad shoulder and a beat up map in one hand, staring at the structure with determination to at least get through this one meeting before permanently bailing on the entire matter making itself known alongside the nerves. Stuffing his phone in his jeans pocket, Alex gave a curt nod to no one in particular in an attempt to psych himself up for this, the breath leaving him in a stubborn huff.

“Okay. Let’s do this.”

***

Alex tended to walk into things unprepared. 

Well, not physically. Physically, he had the process of assuring he had everything he needed on hand at all times down to a science., He always had all the required reading done weeks in advance, topics fully understood, pencils in his bag and always, _always_ a notebook somewhere near. That, he was pretty good at. 

What he wasn’t so great at was walking into things mentally prepared. 

So when he stepped through the doors of the meeting hall, walking right into the middle of the Chronic Illness and Disability Support Group (CIDSG) meeting, he wasn’t quite mentally prepared to find a grand total of seven people sitting there just as the meeting bordered on beginning. Alex made eight. 

So this was gonna be a bit more personal than he had originally thought.

_Yay._

The hall itself was beautiful but very, very empty, the only furniture being a circle of chairs set out in a vaguely circular shape and a single refreshment table with a few sad looking cookies shoved in the corner. When he entered, he very quickly found six pairs of eyes staring at him from their spots in the chairs, pretty much split down the middle between curious gazes and cutting glares. 

Feeling awkward and uncomfortable, Alex hurried to shrug off his bag and sit in the closest empty seat, his footsteps sounding impossibly loud and echoing in the quiet as he purposefully ignoring the pitiful refreshment table. Coincidentally, the closest empty seat just happened to be next to the one and only guy that hadn’t turn to stare at him intensely when he walked in. The reason why was quickly revealed when the boy turned his head slightly, unconsciously letting Alex to see his unfocused, clear but glazed eyes- the kid was blind. 

Just as Alex settled into a chair uncomfortably, huddling in his sweatshirt and taking mental stock of everyone else in the circle while simultaneously wishing that he was anywhere but there, another man strode into the room, cheerful and smiling but way, way too over excited. He took a seat at another empty chair almost directly across from Alex, somehow managing to sit in a way that looked both nervous and extremely enthusiastic at the same time. 

When he started speaking and his voice squeaked with an anxious excitement with his words, Alex couldn’t even find it in himself to be surprised. 

John Adams, he said his name was, but a few minutes in Alex had lost nearly all interest in the man’s explanation of the group, how he had started it, why it had started it, all the standard crap that Alex couldn’t care less about. He played with a spare hair band stashed on his wrist instead, rolling the elastic back and forth on the tips of his fingers and allowing his mind to go off and do it’s own thing for a while. Even when the guy progressed from the introduction and into the standard, awkward ice breakers, Alex didn’t quite click in.

So when John Adams looked at Alex pointedly, loudly asking something of him with over exaggerated words and hand motions to attract his attention, the freshman found himself completely mentally unprepared for the second time in about ten minutes. 

_Nice going, Alex._

“I’m sorry, what?” he asked, gazing pointlessly towards Adams with a significant cluelessness. A few of the other students seemed to be smiling or chuckling at Alex’s stupidity (hilarious) but most just looked annoyed, allowing Alex to deduce that they had a pretty good rhythm going that he had managed to go ahead and screw up. 

“I asked your name and why you are here today,” John Adams said slowly, still over exaggerating the pronunciation of his words, and Alex half mindedly realized that the guy thought he was deaf. Well, oops. “Are you comfortable with telling us this?”

Translation: are you comfortable with telling us why the hell you showed up to a support group for students with chronic illnesses or disabilities when we can’t see anything wrong with you from your appearance?

No, this wasn’t Alex’s first rodeo.

“Uh, sure.” Pushing himself up so that he was a bit more upright, Alex dragged a fidgeting hand through his hair, attempting to make the top of his ponytail neater and probably only succeeding in messing it up more. “Well, I’m Alexander Hamilton, I go by Alex, and I’m a diabetic.”

Adams spared him barely more than a nod before moving on to the next person, the blind kid beside him, and Alex shook his head slightly, trying to click back in. Just as he was running a hand over his hair again, still trying to fix it all he could without actually redoing the ponytail (he wasn’t that desperate), the guy beside him started speaking. 

“My name is Lafayette,” he said, and Alex immediately picked up on the strong French accent stretching and shaping the words. _Native speaker._ “I am a freshman here at Princeton, and I am blind.”

As the group’s attention automatically shifted onto the next student, Alex took a moment to look over Lafayette, bored with the meeting and finding the student far more interesting than the random kid now talking. Sue him, social shit like this didn’t hold his attention for long. 

Even sitting down, Lafayette was tall, and with a thin and lanky build that must have been hell to get up and down stairs. He wore a pair of well-fitted pants with an extremely busy, extremely colorful pattern all over the material under a black sweatshirt, and although Alex considered the fact that Lafayette was blind, something told him that the kid would have dressed the exact same way even if he was able to see what he was putting on. Vibes or something, Alex guessed. 

His hair lead into a thick poof of a ponytail at the back of his head, dark and curly and artfully messy. Ebony skin catching light as he listened to the next student’s introduction, Lafayette was in every way an original. And as Alex watched him in a way that was totally not stalkerish from the seat beside him, he couldn’t help but take note of these things he observed, having not spoken a word to the kid yet but still intrigued with him regardless.

So maybe Alex got a little too transfixed with random strangers he just met. But, really, the meeting was lethally boring and this guy was interesting and Alex was watchful, so he couldn’t really bring himself to feel too guilty about studying this guy like a flipping van Gogh. 

It was when Lafayette seemed to almost jump at the sound of the student going now’s voice that Alex clicked back in yet again to see the guy speaking, a big, muscular guy in a wheelchair. Although his lower half didn’t appear quite as strong, the guy made up for it through the sheer size of his chest and shoulders, an army green beanie perched on the top of his head. “Hercules Mulligan, and paraplegic,” he said easily, voice low and gravelly. Alex didn’t miss the way Lafayette seemed to gain interest at the words, at the voice, lighting up so slightly it was just barely noticeable. 

_I may or may not have just found a fellow gay. Nice._

Alex was so absorbed by watching these two, taking in every detail of the characters he was just beginning to know, that he managed to zone out once again until-

“Uh, hi. I’m John Laurens, and I’m an epileptic.”

-that voice snapped him out of it faster than Alex was ready for. 

The kid that spoke was the last one to go, looking slightly bashful at this fact as he attempted a small smile to the group. His hair was long as well, pulled back into a fox tail of curls and just mussed up enough to be endearing. Wearing a pair of worn jeans with a few stains that looked suspiciously like paint and a t-shirt and jacket duo that sported the same markings, the kid was probably taller than Alex (then again, everyone was taller than Alex, but still) and had the hazel eyes of Alex’s dreams, the exact shade he never knew he liked so much until right this instant. 

_Please let him be gay._

Even though the group transitioned back to John Adams as soon as Laurens finished talking, Alex’s attention stayed focused on the boy almost without his consent. He wasn’t quite sure how that happened, how he managed to be so attracted to this dude so quickly, but he found himself staring at John without making a conscious decision to do so. Between John, Lafayette and Hercules, the rest of the meeting was completely and utterly lost on Alex. Too many other objects of interest, but for very different reasons. 

By the time the meeting ended, Alex had long set his stubborn little mind on speaking to John Laurens before the guy got a chance to leave. _This one is not gonna get away._

So the second the group was dismissed, Alex was on his feet, slinging his canvas bag of back up diabetes equipment (always a fun accessory) over his shoulder as he went with a determined expression set on his face. His ecstasy from earlier had simmered down from a reckless enthusiasm to a constant, steady eagerness, but meeting these guys had manage to drop a Mento of strange, new excitement into his Coke cocktail of emotions, making him feel stupidly fired up all over again but taking advantage of it regardless. He had set out for John before the boy could even get up from his chair. 

To be completely honest, the disaster following really was Alex’s fault, and he totally owned up to it.

He was so focused on getting himself across the circle that he wasn’t paying much attention to his surroundings. So, when Lafayette unknowingly stepped right in his path, Alex didn’t see him until half an instant too late. And suddenly there was a domino effect taking action across the meeting hall in strangely humorous yet horrifying display. 

Alex went barreling into Lafayette, who tripped over himself and flew right smack dab into Hercules Mulligan, the force of the blow enough to knock his wheelchair over in a blur of startled shouts and squeaking tires. The poor guy spilled out across the floor, Lafayette ending up sprawled out on top of him (so maybe that part wasn’t so bad, Alex might have actually been doing him a favor with that one) while Alex managed to catch himself at the last second, frantically backpedaling to try and regain his balance. Skidding to a somewhat stationary position, Alex found himself standing over Lafayette and Hercules in the middle of the circle, the two men on the ground and the few students still remaining in the hall standing frozen around them.

Oops. 

_”Holy shit!”_ Within seconds, John Laurens had slid to a stop before the other three, dropping to his knees beside Lafayette and Hercules with a furiously concerned expression. “What the _hell,_ man?!”

Alex watched John checking over the two men on the ground with wide, shocked eyes, attempting to catch his breath and catch up with what just happened while inwardly cursing his stupidity to no extent. _I just wanted to talk to the hot guy._ “I-“ he stammered, backing away from the situation to make sure he didn’t make anything worse. Lafayette let out an awkward, uncomfortable chuckle as he tried to back off Hercules but only seemed to make them more tangled up, John’s attention momentarily off the two to yell at Alex. 

“Nice going, jackass!” John snapped at him, settling a hand on Lafayette’s shoulder to alert the blind student of his presence. “What the hell were you doing?” 

His eyes blazed, the hazel lit up with anger as he stared Alex down, the look a glare. His cheeks lit with a furious pink, a single curl falling down his forehead and escaped from his ponytail in an overall display of gorgeous passion. Alex found himself staring, a truly eloquent mix consisting of variations of _uh_ escaping him. _This would be so much easier if he was ugly._

“W-whoops?” Alex offered anxiously after several frantic attempts at a sentence crashed and burned, raking a panicked hand over his hair.. Alex gulped, taking a shaky breath at how quickly and how _badly_ he managed to screw up, frantically trying to figure out how to help as he hovered nearby the intertwined mess of barely-adults in the floor. The last few students uninvolved in the action scurried our before they could be pulled into the argument, leaving the four of them mostly alone in the meeting hall. _Damn._

“Can I- can I help-“ Alex asked awkwardly, yet still unmoving as he stood uncomfortably away from the others. Even though he actually was trying to help, a warning glare from John shut him up. _Okay then._

Although John tried to assist Lafayette up, the Frenchman resisted almost immediately, pushing the other student’s hands away while insisting he didn’t need the help in a mix of French and English, his voice gently rejecting. “ _Non,_ I have it,” he repeated, slowly getting to his feet with careful, measured movements. John backed off without much prompting, Alex still frozen a few feet away. 

“Guys, hate to make it all about me, but paralyzed guy is still kinda stuck down here.”

Hercules was pulling himself into a sitting position now that Lafayette wasn’t lowkey pinning him to the ground, offering a quirk of a smile as he gestured to the toppled over wheelchair beside him. “I don’t need to be helped up myself, but my ride could, uh, kind of use it.”

Alex immediately lunged to right the chair, Hercules awkwardly chuckling in a _oh god why me_ way. The student was still on the ground as the smaller man leaped to help, grateful for something to do, something to help with. “Oh, yeah, of course, god, I’m sorry about this-“

Returning a tight-lipped smile in response, Hercules had gotten himself back up in his chair within a few minutes, Lafayette already upright not far away. Although Lafayette and Hercules looked alright besides slightly bruised dignities, John still appeared absolutely livid at Alex and Alex still absolutely appalled at himself. 

Well, at least they had that in common.

“Seriously, what was that? Weren’t you looking where you were going? You almost killed these two!” John fumed, getting to his feet as well and suddenly proving the height difference between Alex and himself. Again, _damn._

“Uh, I don’t mean to interrupt, but he didn’t almost kill anyone,” Hercules spoke up flatly, gaze flickering from student to student as he crossed his arms over his chest. Alex let out a small breath, looking between Hercules and John as his mind spun. “We’re both just fine.”

 _”Oui,”_ Lafayette added helpfully, standing beside Hercules in a way that made Alex feel both lowkey loved while simultaneously screaming _SHIP SHIP SHIP SHIP_ in his mind even as John confronted him. Small wins. 

But, although Alex fully appreciated the two standing up for him against possibly the most attractive man he had ever met, he couldn’t accept the act of being defended. “No, no,” he groaned, dragging an embarrassed hand over his face. “I nearly knocked out a blind kid and a paralyzed guy, I deserve it.”

 _Whoops._

The change was nearly instantaneous. Hercules’ previously concerned expression took on a suddenly sharp, defensive edge, while Lafayette’s morphed into one of hurt, the words hitting hard on unsuspecting targets. Alex froze. 

_Dear god, I did it again._

“Wait, just because I can't feel my legs means I’m more fragile than anyone else?” Hercules’ eyes hardened. “I seriously suggest you don’t go that route. Watch yourself, kid.”

 _”Oui,_ I agree,” Lafayette said, his previously halfway pleasant voice turning flat. His arms crossed over his chest, the dry anger covering the hurt in his expression. “I may be blind but I am not weak.”

The four of them stood in a loose group, suddenly all glaring at each other with cutting stares. Alex found himself right in the middle of it, his mind seeming to fork off in a million different directions with all the different thoughts circulating through his conscious. 

“Oh, god, I know,” he muttered, face flushing as he gulped. “I didn’t mean it like that, I’m sorry-“

“Yeah, well-“ John started, likely starting a chastising towards Alex that would rival one of Ned’s just to be cut off by Hercules, the first student’s snappish voice dying off under the second’s raised hand.

“Hey now, we both know you were thinking along those same lines too, so you’re not exactly allowed to go after him for that yourself-“

“But at least I was trying to _help_ you guys-“

“Come on now, break it up.” With that, John Adams stepped in the middle of the students, effectively cutting off the argument and shutting everyone up. Alex took a few steps back immediately, not needing much prompting, while John reluctantly stepped away, Hercules wheeled himself back a couple paces and Lafayette didn’t really move, not realizing that Adams was there until he spoke.“The meeting’s over, everyone’s alright, and now I insist that you get out of here before someone really is killed!”

Quietly, half mindedly, even as he was being scolded for misconduct at a literal support group, Alex had to wonder just how it was physically possible for a full grown man to make an accusatory sentence like that still sound so enthusiastic. 

“Fine.” John angled his chin up defiantly, sending another cutting look at Alex. And, dammit, even when John was pissed at him the guy was freaking gorgeous. _This is certainly new._ “Let’s hope for all our sakes that we don’t see each other again, why don’t we?”

“Deal,” Hercules agreed dryly, Lafayette voicing his blunt consent from beside him. 

Sighing, Alex nodded as well. _Screwed that one up too. Nice going, Alex._ “Fine. I am sorry, but fine.”

The other boys left the building without much ado, everyone going their different directions with remaining traces of emotions written in their expressions. They were completely alone with the exception of Adams, their voices echoing around the bare, empty space and footsteps resounding through the air. 

Readjusting his canvas bag as he walked out of the hall, Alex pulled his phone from his jean pocket with a sigh, the excitement he had felt before now somehow dulled. 

**TO: Ned Stevens**

_Sucked worse than expected. I blame you._

***

In an attempt to blow off some steam, Alex took the long way back to his dorm. Well, an attempt to blow off some steam paired with more struggling with the map and which direction his dorm was in, but by the time he finally located the building again he had calmed down to at least some extent, so he silently counted that as at least a small score. _You’re fine, everything’s fine. Just get inside, test blood, maybe grab some food and get some work done or something, and go from there. Everything’s fine._

Jamming his brand new, Princeton issued key into the lock of the dorm, Alex twisted it open with a sigh. Hey, at least he might be able to meet his roommates now, figure out what they’re like. Considering he didn’t really know anyone, he didn’t put in any requests in for roommates, so he guessed he ended up with just anyone he was given. Here’s to hoping they weren’t total nutjobs.

But, regardless, he was willing to give the at this point unknown guys a chance. Attempting a small smile to make himself look at least slightly less depressed on the off chance he might run into the people he’d pretty much be sharing his life with for the next year, he pushed open the door and stepped into the room. 

He found himself staring at three equally shocked students, Hercules Mulligan freezing in the middle of a sentence, John’s expression going slack with disbelief and Lafayette just standing still in the kitchen, confused as of why everyone had stopped talking suddenly. The boxes scattered around the room were theirs, all beds except for one had been claimed, the few bits of personalized shit already strung around the space belonged to them.

“Oh _hell_ no.”


	2. Oh My God, They Were Roommates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The guys figure out this whole roommate thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *glances at clock* It is 12:34 am. Hopefully staying up this late to finish this chapter will make up for the fact that I uploaded the first chapter in November and haven’t touched this story since. Forgive me? 
> 
> So, my mind is somewhat fried now. I’ll probably change this note in the morning, when I can come up with cute, witty remarks that make people laugh, and when I’m slightly less zombie-like. Yeah. That sounds good. 
> 
> Anyway, sorry this chapter is a little on the short side. There’s more about this story in the end notes, so check those out of you’re interested. Enjoy!!

“Please don’t tell me that you live here too, cause I honestly don’t know if I’d be able to handle that.”

“No, I found the key forgotten in the middle of the street and I had to risk getting hit by a car to retrieve it and return it to its rightful owners like the good Samaritan I am,” Alex deadpanned automatically, still stunned by the appearance of the exact students that he managed to forge a mutual hatred with within a few minutes of meeting them. _Why me?_ a demanding, somewhat over dramatic part of him asked dismally as he stood in the open doorway of the dorm and prayed that this was just some kind of sick misunderstanding. 

And apparently he wasn’t the only one with that hope, because just then Hercules’ eyes narrowed, expression less than welcoming mixed with a special kind of pissed off shock that generally made Alex want to shrink into the wall and skedaddle his inexperienced ass right out of there. “Don’t get my hopes up,” he growled under his breath, hands tightening around the armrests of his chair. 

But then Alex scoffed suddenly, finally finding the sense to close the door behind him. The shock was beginning to wear off, making way for loads of fun new emotions instead, which Alex wasn’t overly looking forward to. “Yes, moron, I live here too,” he snapped as he turned back to the room, instincts to be civil and reflexes to be offensive battling it out within him, matched with the strange sense of shock and excitement and absolute, unadulterated despair at being paired with these three. “I assume the same goes for you guys?” 

“Yes, because we all just seem to be that terribly unfortunate,” Lafayette muttered, recognizing Alex’s voice and putting the pieces together in his mind even without anyone flat out telling him that, hey, the guy that nearly bulldozed you about half an hour ago is now living with you. Alex had to respect that perceptiveness, at the least. The student seemed less than pleased with this situation, but Alex also got the idea that Lafayette was mostly the kind of guy to just sort of roll with the punches, so he wasn’t too worried about the Frenchman. Hell, maybe they’d even be friends at some point. 

He’s really the only one that doesn’t scare the shit out of Alex upon eye contact. 

“I swear to god, I think I’m gonna chuck something at the wall if one more thing goes to shit,” John said flatly, suddenly bringing Alex’s attention back to him with startling speed and reminding him of just how accurate the ‘scare the shit out of Alex upon eye contact’ thing was. 

The student stood in a kitchenette type thing that was likely meant to be an actual kitchen but only really succeeded in being an almost laughingly small parody of one, the countertops some cheap material and the tile lining the floor looking less than sanitary. John leaned back against the counter, arms crossed over his chest with a dry expression on his face and the single brown curl still falling down his forehead. He had taken his jacket off since the last time Alex saw him, leaving the man standing in jeans and a short sleeve, faded and worn band shirt, the pants joining it with the appearance of several splashes of seemingly randomly placed color splattered over them. From the pen-drawn doodles wrapping their way around John’s hand and wrist, Alex was suddenly sure that they were paint or a similar substance, compared to his suspicions back at the support group. An artist, then. 

“I think I’ll join you,” Hercules agreed bluntly, wry gaze flickering from student to student. “So. What are we gonna do about this?”

“What is there to do?” John retorted, not moving from the counter. He was relaxed and tense all at once, an open box still at his feet, abandoned but waiting. “They’re not going to let us switch roommates the first day on campus, it would just be dumb to even try.”

“How did this even happen?” Alex asked tonelessly, not really expecting an answer but wondering anyway. He leaned back against the closed door, flattening his hands on the wood and finding the smooth surface strangely comforting. Good old foster system instincts were pretty satisfied with his location as well; he was close enough to an exit that he could make a fast exit need be, but enough into the room that this fact wasn’t noticeable. “How did four guys with our conditions end up in the same damn dorm?”

“A cruel joke from someone on the staff?” Hercules suggested bluntly, expression dark.

“Fate,” Lafayette deadpanned. 

“A really, really terrible coincidence.” John pushed off the counter, walking into the main area where the other students were gathered. Alex watched him come closer, the other boy’s gaze flickering over to meet his own briefly before looking away again. “Or possibly a combination of the three.”

“Perhaps,” Alex agreed, swallowing the rush of emotion that came with the short eye contact. Those would be the exact feelings he wasn’t looking forward to when the shock wore off, the student quickly thankful for the support of the door. 

Hercules sighed, leaning his head into his hand as he glanced around the room. “So, we’re just stuck with each other now? No chance of getting out of this?” His question brought them back to the point of the conversation, Alex suddenly finding himself glad for the distraction. 

Lafayette sighed. “I would suggest we room with other friends, but considering I have no friends here and I’m assuming the same applies to the rest of you, I do not see this as a conceivable option.”

“You’re not wrong,” Alex admitted. “I just moved to this state entirely; god knows I’ve met literally three people yet, who happen to be in this room. And who also happen to likely wish death upon me, but that’s another topic entirely that I’m guessing we don’t want to go into at the moment”

Perking up, Lafayette looked towards Alex. “Oh? Where are you from?” he asked brightly, seemingly pleased with the fact that he wasn’t the only new one in the group and wisely overlooking the last part of Alex’s remark. 

A small smiled quirked at the corner of Alex’s mouth against his better judgement at the student’s question. He was beginning to warm up to the Frenchman, even if it wasn’t much of a conscious decision or, really, a choice. Lafayette was just one of those people you _had_ to like, like Morgan Freeman or Reece Witherspoon on a much, much tamer, innocent, puppy-that-just-realized-it-has-mostly-workable-legs way. “Well, I’ve lived a lot of places, but I moved in from Virginia,” he explained, still smiling faintly. 

John suddenly looked up at Alex, a small, puzzled smile growing across his face as well and expression strangely, suddenly friendly. It was attractive on him, the smile, the expression entirely, Alex quietly noted. “South Carolina,” he said in an odd sense of similarity, a common link to the kid he had nearly pulverized just about an hour earlier. 

Alex’s grin grew, head tilting slightly. “Really? What part?”

“Hey now, cut the chit-chat,” Hercules cut in gruffly, looking somewhat amused by the exchange but hiding his humor behind his glare without much malice. “We still have to figure out what we do now.”

“I do not think there is much to figure out,” Lafayette said honestly. “We’re stuck like this, quite simply. We can’t move dorms, we cannot move in with friends, and we must stay in a dorm our first year. We are staying here, together, until something more permanent can be arranged.”

“Alright then, if we’re staying here at least semi-permanently, I’ve got some ground rules to lay down.” Alex walked over to where the collection of his few belongings were slumped on the ground, crouching down to dig through a particular duffel for a moment. A moment later, he stood up with a small black bag in his grip, the material familiar and worn in his hand. 

“This is my diabetes stuff,” he said in way of explanation, rattling the kit briefly to demonstrate. “There are insulin needles in here that I need to stab into my body multiple times a day to survive. Basically, don’t take them. I don’t care if it’s to shoot up with heroin or meth or whatever else kids are trading for valuable cash these days or to do a shitty DIY watercolor project, don’t take them.” Shaking the bag again to exaggerate his point, Alex looked at each of them pointedly. “Seriously. Needles are off limits. No touchy. You got that?”

“Got it,” John said defensively, holding up his hands in surrender. “Chill. We’re not gonna take your syringes, we’re all already screwed up enough. Don’t need to drug ourselves on top of it.”

Alex turned a flat glare to the student. “Hey, I’ve had problems in the past with this stuff. I’d rather not go through that one again, so I’m playing it safe.”

Hercules raised an eyebrow, actually looking somewhat interested at that. His posture was relaxed in the chair, everyone slowly beginning to become vaguely companionable even if they didn’t fully realize it at the time. “What, high school kids swipe a couple hypodermics and scar you for life or something?”

“No, actually. Foster siblings,” Alex corrected. “I swear I was convinced for a while that those parents were just gonna throw me out into the snow, as if it was somehow my fault that their perfect child was caught shooting up in the school bathroom with my needles.” He snorted, settling the bag back into his duffle where he’d be able to reach it when needed. Straightening, he crossed his arms over his chest. “That was a memorable placement.”

“Foster system?” John repeated. “What happened to your folks that got you stuck in that hellhole?”

“You know, saying that so plainly could be considered highly offensive,” Alex reminded brightly. 

“Well, you don’t seem to messed up over it. Gonna answer the question or no?”

Alex suddenly found himself missing the solid support of the door behind him. He shrugged easily, as if this didn’t affect him, and answered before a questionable amount of time was able to pass. “Dead and deadbeat.”

Lafayette turned to Alex with a strangely excited expression. “Oh, me as well!”

John quirked a smile. “Same, pretty much. Dead and dead to me.”

“Wow.” Hercules looked uncomfortable and vaguely freaked out, looking at the three other students warily. “Y’all are a fun bunch, aren’t you?”

Huffing a laugh, John slipped one hand into his jeans pocket comfortably, cocking one leg and shifting his weight onto the other. “I’m just gonna assume that you’re not a sob story yourself?” he offered, an easy but bitter smile still draped across his face. “Grew up with a wonderful family and your 1.2 siblings in a suburb just off a major city, with a soccer mom minivan and a friendly golden retriever?”

“Hey, don’t you dare go after Zeus,” Hercules said defensively, and Alex nearly choked on his own spit. “And yes, actually. I had a normal childhood with living parents and a great brother, unlike all you freaks.”

“ _Zeus,”_ Alex finally got out. _”Zeus?!”_

“Don’t you dare judge.”

“Getting off of that topic, we likely should discuss the rooming situation,” Lafayette intervened loudly, obviously trying to change the subject before anyone (namely Hercules) started throwing punches. Alex couldn’t blame him, but really, _Zeus._ The Mulligans clearly had a problem with Greek gods. 

Hercules gladly took the opportunity to speak of something else, shooting one last warning look at Alex as he went. “Yeah, Lafayette’s right, actually. There’s only two bedrooms, so we’re each gonna have to room with one other to make this work.”

Immediately, Lafayette jumped forward again, looking as if he’d been waiting for this moment his entire life. “I am willing to room with Hercules,” he said quickly, likely attempting to look disinterested but only causing Alex to internally snort. _Smooth._

“That’s fine by me,” Hercules agreed.

“So… I guess that leaves us.” John eyed Alex in something resembling disdain but not quite as sharp, standing with his arms crossed over his chest and more curls beginning to loosen from the ponytail, falling casually to frame John’s face. Alex had to remind himself to breathe as John’s hazel eyes flickered up to meet his own again. “You cool with that?”

Unfortunately, as much as Alex wanted to scream out a _HELL YES,_ he had to consider that he and John had gotten along less than spectacularly so far, with the exception of that one strange moment of alliance with the Southern similarities thing. But, looking at the hope written in Lafayette’s expression and considering the shipping instincts long ingrained in Alex’s very chemical makeup from admittedly occasionally regrettable but always valuable years of fandom, he certainly knew some things were worth making sacrifices for. Yeah, he might end up being murdered in his sleep as a result of that sacrifice, but at least his ship would sail. Small wins. 

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

_Oh, the things we do for love._

_I just kind of wish it was my love._

***

“I claim the bathroom first.”

“Wait, no-“

“I’m sorry, are you the one that has to stab a needle into their finger to make sure they’re not actively about to spontaneously pass out from dangerous blood sugar levels?”

“I… I hate you.”

“Love you too, Hercules.”

Alex slipped into the bathroom and closed the door firmly behind him, his trusty black bag within his grip. The moment the door was shut, he let himself fall back against it, careful to make no noise but finding himself needing the support. 

No, it wasn’t because of his blood levels or anything like that. It was more of a _thank god I’m finally able to chill for a sec_ thing after the day he’d just had, drained after the excitement of Princeton paired with the insanity of support group, the insanity that came after support group, the day all in all forming an ever lovely combination of emotionally exhausting shit all blended and smashed together to form a feeling cocktail that Alex was so overly done with by this point. Also, the bathroom was literally the only place to get even a glimpse of privacy in the entire dorm, so he was kind of savoring it while he had it. 

Sliding down to sit against the door, Alex pulled his phone out of his jeans pocket in a slightly awkward maneuver and set his bag on the questionably clean floor beside him. Making sure his weight stayed against the door, keeping it firmly shut, he dialed Ned’s number from memory and waited for him to pick up with a sigh, rubbing at his temples to try and relieve some of the headache he could just feel forming. 

_”Hello?”_

“Hey, Ned. Can’t talk for long, but I figured I’d give you an update on my first day real fast.”

_”Would you look at that, you survived. Congratulations, just four more years to go. You’re so close.”_

Alex huffed a laugh, finding a strange comfort in the familiarity of Ned’s voice even if he’d never admit to it and thankful for the reassurance after the stress of the day. “You’ve always been so encouraging.”

 _”I try.”_ There’s a shift across the line, and Alex is sure Ned’s getting comfortable, settling in for Alex’s typical bitching session that usually came after a particularly tough day. _”So? How’d it go?”_

“It was, uh, interesting,” Alex said carefully, knowing that he was totally welcome to bitch his heart out but not quite feeling it at the moment. Emotional exhaustion makes a comeback. “Real interesting. The support group bombed, and then it turned out I got the same three guys I almost got beaten up by and vice versa are my roommates, which was a fun twist, let me tell you, and now I feel like I’m about to simultaneously fall asleep standing up and never sleep again in the next decade. So, interesting.”

“ARE YOU LITERALLY _TALKING_ IN THERE?! I SWEAR, IF YOU’RE TALKING DURING YOUR PRECIOUS BATHROOM TIME, I’LL TO PISS IN YOUR BED. DON’T DOUBT ME!”

“SHUT UP, LAURENS!”

“GET OUT OF THE DAMN BATHROOM!”

 _”That certainly does sound interesting,”_ Ned said simply, wisely choosing to overlook most of the other background noise, or at least the content. _”Who’s the disembodied voice?”_

“That would be John Laurens.”

_”I see. Is he cute? He sounds cute.”_

“You know what, I’ve really gotta go-“

 _”Come on, Alex,”_ Ned laughed gently. _”I’m teasing you.”_

“I know. But, I actually should go. I‘m kind of the first of four in a line to use the bathroom, and I’m using up most my time on you. I mean, I still need to test and everything, and you know how long that can take. I really should go.”

_”I swear to god, Hamilton, if you’re talking to me from the toilet-“_

_”Goodbye,_ Ned.” Hanging up the call before the other boy can get in anything else, Alex dropped his phone onto his lap and let his head fall back against the wood of the door for just a split second, just a moment to himself and solely himself. 

This seriously wasn’t how he imagined his first day of college going. 

“ALEX, SERIOUSLY, I REALLY NEED TO TAKE A PISS. _MOVE.”_

Nope. Wasn’t how he imagined college in the slightest. 

_Sometimes the unexpected in life is the best in life,_ a helpful voice piped up in his mind. 

_Shut up and let me wallow,_ he returned dryly. 

Pushing himself to his feet with a sigh, Alex grabbed his bag and began pulling out his equipment. No, this wasn’t what he expected. So, really, that just meant he’d have to experience everything for the first time as he did it, figure all this out on his feet. 

Well, at least it wouldn’t be boring. 

Alex had to give it that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE NOTE: So, the main characters each have some variation of a chronic illness or disability in this story. I do not share any of these with them, and haven’t experienced any of them first hand. I don’t claim to be qualified in any way to know the most basic things about what it’s like to live with these disabilities or illnesses, and although I have done extensive research I’m sure I’ll miss something. So, if you see something amiss (even the slightest, tiniest thing that I might get wrong), please let me know so I can fix it!! 
> 
> Also, I think this story will one of those that I update whenever I can. It will be continuously updated, just not very regularly. And I am truly sorry for the amount of time between the first and second chapters being posted!! 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading and see you guys soon!


	3. Here Comes the General

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex goes to his first college class and we meet one Professor George Washington.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I haven’t updated this story in months, but don’t think for an instant that I ever forgot about it! I’m so sorry for the long delay but I hope you like this chapter anyway. 
> 
> Enjoy!!

When it turned out the four of them all had the same damn class of Government with Professor George Washington, Alex wasn’t even surprised. His shock supply had pretty much run dry by this point.

The other guys had more or less the same lack of reaction, realizing they were all stuck together once again with only an exasperated sigh of resignation and a brief shake of their heads. But, even still, they went in with the the unanimous yet unspoken agreement of an intention to grabbing seats as far away from one another as they’d possibly be able to in the small classroom, not give even the idea of any sort of relation between them. Keep things as distant and courteously separate as they could in an attempt to keep the casualty count to a minimum.

So Alex walked into the class and his gaze immediately settled on the fact that Hercules and Lafayette were, somehow, sitting side by side, his shipping heart nearly fainted. Despite the fact that Hercules looked faintly peeved and Lafayette uncomfortable, Alex knew that their pairing was likely unplanned but still a wonderfully convenient twist of fate, and he was apologetically inwardly cheering at it. 

The other students in the class nearly packed the room close to maximum capacity, a few talking to each other in low voices here and there but most just waiting in quiet for the class to start, playing with their phones or staring off into space with knees bouncing or fingers tapping impatiently. One kid even brought a thick chapter book he was now reading intently, Alex staring at the top of his nearly shaved head in slightly confused distaste. That dude clearly wasn’t fooling around with this college shit.

But then Alex’s gaze flickered over the rest of the room to find only one chair, _one damn chair_ still open with none other than an incredibly pissed off John Laurens sitting beside it, and Alex could have sworn he heard karma laughing.

Staring at Alex in undisguised disgust, John had obviously already put two and two together, his arms crossed over his chest huffily and eyes glaring. He slouched down in his seat, bag slung over the back of his chair and unflinching glare never leaving Alex, seeming to dare him to sit down.

But as much as Alex would love to sit literally _anywhere but there,_ he knew he had no choice in the matter, instead dreadingly dragging himself over to the empty chair with his heavy canvas bag forever slung over his shoulder. He sort of hated the way his heart jumped at the idea of being next to John for a class, honestly. He already shared a room with the guy, and their hostile relationship definitely hadn’t improved any since they first moved in, so Alex knew his stupid crush was ultimately hopeless. But, still, it lingered despite Alex’s best attempts to shoo it away. 

Dropping down into the chair heavily, he settled his bag between his feet and leaned forward onto the table, letting his elbows rest upon the wood with his hands folded. Glancing over at John with a quiet kind of exasperated amusement, he offered a toothy, ingenuine smile. “Hey there. I don’t think we’ve met, I’m Alex Hamilton-”

“Shut up,” John growled, pointedly avoiding eye contact. His hair was half pulled up today, some of his curls allowed to poof around his shoulders with the typical few strands framing his face, and Alex would have stomped on his stupid racing heart if nature allowed it. 

Alex frowned in annoyance, smoothing a flyaway of his own behind his ear. “Well, you’re no fun.” He sat back in his chair, propping his right ankle up on is left knee. “I mean, this obviously sucks, but I thought I’d at least try to get a laugh outta you.”

John shook his head, scoffing under his breath irritably. “Yeah, well, don’t.”

“You must be fun at parties.”

“Oh, I’m a blast,” John replied without changing his dry, uninterested tone of voice. 

“Good for you.” Alex glanced at his watch, accepting that John wasn’t in the mood for conversation and instead looking for another distraction to waste away the few minutes. 

According to the face of his wristwatch, class was going to be starting any minute now, so he just had to entertain himself for a short amount of time more in order to keep himself from thinking too much about the fact that his very first college class was literally moments away from starting. Honestly, if he did let himself truly absorb it, he wasn’t entirely sure if he would get incredibly excited or spiral into a panic attack and he wasn’t really feeling like letting either option happen at the moment, so a distraction would really be great right about now. 

As if on cue, his cell buzzed in his pocket with an incoming text. Shifting to pull his phone out into the open, the screen flashed to life with a bright notification.

**FROM: Ned Stevens**

_You got this, Hamilton. Kick some college ass._

Alex smiled with an exhale of a laugh at his friend, not finding it in himself to be surprised at his nearly impeccable timing. Ned was weird like that; able to remember exact times, dates and details as if he was incapable of forgetting them. Despite Ned being the little shit he was, of course he’d remember Alex’s first class. Alex shouldn’t have expected anything less of the guy. 

Quickly, he responded, calling Ned a stalker and knowing that neither of them would be taking the message seriously. Just as he pressed send, the door to the classroom swung open and a man entered, and the soft chattering being traded between a few students here and there ceased immediately as all gazes snapped to the stranger, Alex stuffing his phone back in his pocket. 

The man walking in had an instantly profound effect on the entire class, Alex couldn’t deny that much. He strode through the door with his head held high and a presence that demanded respect, thick, dark eyebrows set low over his stern eyes and large briefcase held at his side. With his tall stature, sharp jaw and strict expression as he walked to the front of the room, gravely surveying the silent class as he went, Alex knew that this guy wasn’t one to mess around with. 

He was older, maybe in his fifties, wearing a pressed suit of midnight blue and white. His thoughts were unreadable in his expression as he walked, and Alex found himself having the sudden, almost irrational urge to sit up straighter, pull his head up higher, draw attention to himself and challenge this man’s authority that seemed to bleed right out of his irritatingly perfect posture and uplifted chin. 

But then he reached his desk, stopped walking, and set his briefcase down on the desk before him. Straightening, his clear gaze flickered over the class again, severe and observant. “Good morning,” he said, voice deep but not unkind. “Welcome to Government. I’m George Washington-“ he opened his briefcase as he spoke, removing his computer and a handful of papers from its depths -“and I’ll be your professor for the time you spend in this course.”

Alex watched the man, observant and wary, unsure of what he thought of him yet. As Alex’s gaze flickered across the room, he found most of the students staring at Washington like he was the single most sacred and interesting thing they’d ever seen in their pathetic little lives. But, one student that stood out from the crowd was the guy Alex had seen reading the enormous chapter book earlier, looking interested but respectfully detached, and like he was also a little confused by the hold Washington seemed to have on the rest of the class and wasn’t quite certain of he felt the same way. Alex quietly noted that kid to look into later.

“I’m looking forward to getting to know all of you over the course of this class, but since I know you’re all so anxious to start learning about the mechanics of government-” the class laughed politely at the dry joke “-we’ll start working immediately.”

It was then, barely a few minutes into the class, that Alex saw John stiffen out of the corner of his eye. 

A split second before it happened, Alex knew something was wrong, just beginning to look over at John when the poor guy started convulsing. 

A few of the students yelled in alarm or concern when they saw John go crashing out of his chair, cutting off the beginning of Washington’s lecture and instantly alerting the entire class of what was going on. Alex, in a motion that was partly conscious and partly instinctive, forcibly shoved John’s chair out of the way, his eyes wide in shock as he watched John seize on the ground, the guy’s eyes rolling back in his head. When Alex looked up in a panicked attempt to find help, Hercules was staring at him from across the room intensely in a rare moment of recognition with the same panic written in his gaze. 

“Give him space, and let me through.”

And suddenly, there was Washington, rushing from the front of the room and sliding into a kneel beside John as if he’d done it thousands of times before. Alex scrabbled to his feet to give John room, backing up into the ring of people already forming around the commotion.

The students watched in stunned fascination as Washington did everything from rapidly clearing an area of free space around John, pushing desks and chairs out of the way and ushering students back with practiced, calm urgency to snatching a jacket thrown over the back of a nearby chair and balling it up, carefully and skillfully sliding it beneath John’s head to protect his skull from being banged against the floor. It was as if the routine had been perfected by experience, maneuvering around John’s jerking without a shred of uncertainty and doing what he needed with an air of grim confidence. 

Then, “Son, do you know him?”

Alex jumped, meeting Washington’s intense eyes automatically at the question. The professor was still kneeling on the ground, giving John space but poised to help if needed, staring at Alex but glancing at his watch every few seconds as he timed the seizure. “He’s my roommate,” Alex offered helplessly in response, finding himself unable to look away as John convulsed on the floor. 

Distantly, he wondered if there was anything he could do to help. But, no, there wasn’t, he decided a moment later. He’d never witnessed a seizure before, and he was sure that doing the Millennial thing and googling it would take too much time in the moment. Besides, Washington sure seemed to have it handled. And, if the few students recording the action on their phones had anything to say about it, the rest of the class felt the same way about Washington’s expertise. Alex glared at the rude videographers until they lowered their phones in shame.

“Lafayette and I are too,” Hercules explained, Lafayette standing beside him where they were hovering at the edge of the crowd, as if they weren’t quite sure where they belonged in the vaguely controlled chaos. “We’re all in a dorm together.”

“Excellent,” Washington said, glancing at his watch again. “Can you tell me if this is the first seizure he’s had?”

“Oh, no, no, he has epilepsy.” Alex suddenly felt really stupid for not saying anything about John’s condition sooner, but really, he hadn’t even thought about it. The second John went crashing into spasms, all logical thought seemingly went soaring out of Alex’s head. Typical, Alex thought dryly. The hot guy has a seizure and Alex is reduced to an useless blob of worries and shock. 

Washington nodded in acknowledgement. “Alright, that’s actually quite a good thing. It means the seizure isn’t a clue of a more serious condition,” he explained, glancing up at Alex. “Does the boy have a name?”

“John,” Alex said, voice soft. “John Laurens.”

Offering a small but genuine smile, Washington looked tense yet not exceptionally worried, just alert. “Well, I believe our epileptic Mr. Laurens will be just fine, in that case,” he said, voice sure. 

As if on cue, finally, blissfully, John began to still, his jerking fading and body relaxing.

Looking at his watch, Washington nodded. “Two minutes, fourty-eight seconds,” he reported, sighing in relief. “Yes, he should be just fine.” He looked around at the students still gathering around the scene like school children to a fight, then gestured to the door. “The material of the first class can be found online, and feel free to email me with any questions you have. You are dismissed.” When the students just glanced at each other, as if they weren’t sure Washington was talking to them specifically, he motioned again towards the door, the gesture becoming less courteous and more firm, shooing them away. “Please, leave. Except for you three,” he added, the words directed at Alex, Hercules and Lafayette. “I’ll be needing you to get him home.”

As the students began to filter out of the room, Washington gently started moving John into what Alex recognized as the recovery position, as if the professor had done it a thousand times before. Alex found himself standing beside Lafayette and Hercules now, watching from the distance of a few feet with the sort of uneasy concern that came when one witnessed something they felt they shouldn’t have. Washington, however, seemed entirely comfortable in the situation. Alex couldn’t help but think that the man currently kneeling beside his fallen student seemed like an entirely different person than the man who had strode into the classroom and instantly casted respecting silence across the students just moments before, going from professional and strict to comforting and knowledgeable in seconds. 

“What are your names?”

Alex once again met Washington’s eyes automatically. “Alex Hamilton,” he said, Hercules and Lafayette introducing themselves as well at his sides. They were now alone in the classroom with the rest of the students having left, the space seeming strangely large with the absence of as many people as there previously were. Alex related it, quite distantly, to an empty cafeteria- you could only realize how big, loud, and chaotic it usually was when the noise and chaos were subtracted from the equation. Then, it was just big, and empty, and silent.

Washington sat back on his heels, looking from each of the guys to another, taking in the wheelchair and Lafayette’s unfocused eyes before looking back at John, who was still unconscious on the floor. He paused for a long moment, letting the quiet settle as John’s breathing steadied and the other three of them hesitantly relaxed. Washington studied them without a shred of apology, likely thinking over the fact that they were somehow all roommates with the way they were, brow furrowing in something that could be thought and then maybe puzzlement, as he fixed his gaze on Alex, his eyes calculating as he scanned over Alex’s physically intact body. 

“I’m diabetic, in case you were wondering if there was anything wrong with me too,” Alex said flatly. Although Washington looked a little surprised at Alex’s blunt tone and deadpan delivery and Hercules shot him a look that suggested the rudeness of his statement, Alex felt like it needed to be said, if the professor was going to sit there and stare them down like they were exceptionally interesting specimens of the human race. He knew the group of them were somewhat of a hard pill to swallow (medical pun intended) but, really, now that the danger of John’s unexpected seizure had passed and Alex’s stunned mind had begun to cautiously unfreeze, he returned to his former thoughts on Washington. As in, he wasn’t quite sure of the man, not yet, and the kind of rude way he was staring at them didn’t exactly help his case. 

But then Washington bit his lip gently in thought, and said, “You know, if you ever find yourself needing anything, please don’t hesitate to email me. You see, my step-daughter, Patsy, was an epileptic and my step-son had a few health issues of his own, so I have some experience with these things, if you require help with anything.”

Okay, so maybe the guy wasn’t quite as bad as Alex had originally thought. He still was going to be careful around him, though. Plenty of terrible men had played the nice guy routine around Alex before. Caution couldn’t hurt anything. 

Hercules smiled, a little surprised but appreciative, shooting a _take that_ expression at Alex before returning to his polite and thankful expression. “Thank you, Mr. Washington,” he said in a bit of a confused but accepting tone of voice.

Then, “Ah, shit.”

All of Alex’s distracted thoughts swept out of his mind as his gaze instantly snapped to John, who was blinking blearily and wincing as he came to. Alex found himself dropping to his knees on John’s other side, his hands hovering over John’s body in an attempt to either keep him down or help him up, whatever he might have needed. This was definitely uncharted territory for Alex; despite being a diabetic since he was twelve and his mom being a diabetic his entire life and having had dealt with plenty of fun things related to that over the years, he was flying blind here with the whole seizure thing and was completely willing to admit it. 

Also, John had literally just spent several minutes uncontrollably jerking on the floor, and he _still_ looked hot, with his artfully mussed hair and muddled eyes. Forgive Alex for being a little distracted by that.

“You had a seizure, son,” Washington was explaining to John, who looked a little dazed but at least somewhat with it. “It lasted less than three minutes. You didn’t miss much- I dismissed the rest of the students, and class is cancelled for today. You’re going to be fine.”

John nodded, but then his gaze fixed on Alex, who was still kneeling beside him. “Hamilton?” he muttered, sounding confused and a little disgusted. 

Alex met his eyes with a flat stare. “Controlled seizures, my ass,” he deadpanned. _You scared the hell out of me, Laurens._

“How are you feeling, John?” Washington interrupted, setting a concerned but redirecting hand on John’s knee in an attempt to dissolve the tension before it started. 

Wincing, John propped himself up onto his elbows, Washington and Alex’s hands hovering near him in case he wasn’t able to handle the change but John staying stubbornly steady. “Uh, headache,” John answered, his words a little slurred.

“Is that normal for you, after a seizure?”

“Yeah.” John took in the lingering presence of Hercules and Lafayette with little more than a squint, but then looked at Washington, his eyebrows furrowing. “What happened?”

Alex looked at Washington with concerned inquiry flaring in his gaze. John probably shouldn’t of forgotten that quickly, should he have? Was that normal for seizure patients? His eyes cutting to John, Alex found a new spike of panic within the possibilities of what this could mean. What if John had gotten a concussion or something when he fell? God, a concussion seriously wouldn’t be good.

But Washington just calmly repeated what he had told John earlier, then looked at the others, a reassuring smile on his face. “Don’t worry, confusion is common after seizures, as is slurring and tiredness,” he explained. “He might be like this for a while still.”

“Is there anything we may do to help him?” Lafayette asked, his voice concerned. Of course Lafayette would be worried and wanting to help, Alex noted distantly as his brewing panic began to fade with the reassurance. The guy was purer than a glass of Brita water.

“Just get him home and give him some time to rest,” Washington smiled, his tone calm and assuring. “He might be out of it for a bit, but he’ll be just fine.”

Alex nodded, feeling a small give of relief drop in his chest. “Great,” he said, meaning it. “Thank you so much for your help today, Washington.”

Washington just smiled and began to get to his feet, slow but steady. “Feel free to email me with any questions or concerns you might have.”

Hercules looked down at John, who was looking as if he was about to fall asleep right then and there on the floor. “You ready to go back to the dorm, man?”

John looked up blearily. “What happened?” he slurred.

Alex wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry. 

***

By the time they managed to get back to the dorm, John looked like exhaustion was going to be his cause of death. Once they got inside the dorm itself, John didn’t say a word before shambling off to his and Alex’s shared bedroom to collapse into bed.

“I seem to remember him saying his seizures were controlled,” Alex muttered hotly as he dropped his bag on the couch, Hercules wheeling himself in through the door as Lafayette lowered himself into their armchair with a sigh. 

Now that they were all back in the dorm again with no one but each other to bear witness, all the guys seemed to slump in a way that could only be described as weary, and Alex realized just how much John’s seizure had seemed to take out of all of them. Intense worrying was tiring, and now that they knew John was okay, the resulting flood of intense relief was exhausting. Alex plopped down beside his back and let his head drop back against the cheap couch cushion, honestly understanding the weakness that came with alleviation of stress but still feeling guilty for feeling so wiped himself after he wasn’t the one to have a seizure in the middle of class. 

“The seizure may have been triggered by something unexpected,” Lafayette offered, folding his legs to his chest in the armchair and resting his chin on his knees. “We do not know the details of his condition yet.”

“Lafayette’s right,” Hercules agreed in a gravelly tone. He stopped his wheelchair in the living room and pulled his beanie off his head to drag a hand over the back of his neck, looking drained. “But I get what you’re saying, Alex. That whole thing kind of scared the shit outta me, not gonna lie.”

A spark of surprise ignited in Alex at Hercules Mulligan actually _agreeing_ with him, but he let it go for now, not feeling up to ribbing on him like he usually would. Sighing, crossed his arms behind his head to act as a pillow against the back of the sofa, settling into the cushions and taking a deep breath. “He’s gonna be fine,” Alex said, half to remind himself and half to remind the others. “This is something like normal for him, remember. He’s gonna be okay.”

“I know,” Lafayette murmured, unseeing eyes gazing at the carpet with his arms looked around his knees, “but I cannot help but feel for John. This must be terrible for him.” 

Alex stared at the ceiling, eyes tracing the shadows, trying to imagine how it must be to know you might go crashing into a seizure at any given moment. At least with diabetes, you had some ways of testing and managing what wasn’t working right in your body, but with many cases of epilepsy, it was different. And, god, it had to suck so much. “You’re right,” he agreed softly, voice quiet. 

Hercules was playing with his beanie in his lap, turning it over in his hands and watching the army green material fold in his fingers. “We’re going to have to have a talk with John once he’s feeling better,” he decided, voice low. “We were lucky that Washington was there today, and that he knew what to do. But if John ever has another seizure here, or in public without someone around who knows what they’re doing, it’s going to be on us to make sure he’s okay.” Hercules didn’t look up from his beanie, but his hands stilled, voice steadying with his thoughts. “Now that we’re here, and together, and the way that we all are, I guess we’re going to have to take care of each other now and again. It might not be the perfect situation, but it might be the only situation we’ve got.”

Lafayette made a noise of agreement, biting his lip slightly. _”Oui,”_ he agreed simply, voice soft. 

Alex exhaled, his gaze steadying on one spot on the ceiling. Hercules was right, he supposed. Here at Princeton, they had each other and not really much else. There weren’t any foster families or parents or relatives watching out for them anymore. If they didn’t look out for each other, they’d be alone in the world, and being themselves, being alone in the world was an absolutely terrible idea. 

There definitely was ground to be covered in the getting along compartment of their relationships, but Alex figured that was something they could work on. Somebody needed to be around to pull Alex out of his reactions and time John’s seizures and help Hercules with his wheelchair and keep Lafayette out of traffic, and Alex supposed they were all going to have to be that somebody for one another. They didn’t have much of a choice otherwise. 

They didn’t have much, but they had each other. 

Alex could only wonder if it would be enough. 

God, he hoped it would be enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did do a lot of research on this chapter in an attempt to portray John’s seizure accurately, but if you see anything at all wrong, _please_ let me know and tell me how to correct it!! Doing this right is really, really important to me, so don’t be afraid to tell me if you find a mistake! 
> 
> Also, as usual, just wanted to let you guys know that this work, and any work by me, is a safe place. I may not update this story very regularly but I am _always_ around, so if you ever find yourself needing to vent, rant, or just talk to somebody, I’m here and the comments are always open to you! If you want it to be anonymous, comment as a guest and I will never be able to track it back to you, your email, or your actual account, if you have one. Never feel pressured to do anything you aren’t comfortable with, but just in case you ever need a listening ear, know that you’ve always got mine ;)
> 
> I hope you have a an incredibly great day, and please let me know how I did with this chapter if you have the time!! Thanks so much for reading!! <3


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